So, he purchased this dilapidated old car for $1850, and took it to his garage.  From the get-go committing to this car was an all-in dedication.  He got the old coupe onto his trailer and began the haul down the Pennsylvania Turnpike.  It would be a couple of hours until he could safely park the car in his garage. 

While the Old coupe and the family’s ‘69 Chevelle wagon were cruising down the turnpike, my Father-in-law heard a loud noise.  And, with immediate fear of the unknown and a quick glance backwards he saw that the spare tire on the back of the old coupe had somehow gotten loose and was now freely bouncing down the highway.  Without much time to think of options, he hurriedly pulled over, jumped out and began running after that tire on the loose!  As my Father-in-law was sharing this with me, he kind of chuckled at himself, imagining what a dangerous scene that was as cars were swerving and braking! 

Stressed, rightly afraid, and with his heart nearly beating out of his chest, he was now rolling the tire back to safety, and resuming the Old Coupe’s haul to its new home.

Ya know, it might be kind of weird to think about… but, if the old coupe had thoughts of its own, I wonder what it would have been thinking when being jostled from what might have become familiar. 

What would it have felt while being taken into a place unknown?  It's possible that it may have felt excitement and freedom when imagining the possibilities. 

Or, possibly, it could have been scared and reluctant to the coming change. 

Maybe it became comfortable with it’s broken down state and didn’t even want to be restored. 

If the Old Coupe had a will of its own, maybe it purposefully threw the spare tire to the pavement in some sort of rebellion. 

Kind of silly analogy… but, what if, right?

I mean, sometimes when God is choosing to restore me, I can go kicking and screaming.  I don’t want the change.  I just want to be left alone in my seemingly “safe” state.  Change is unknown, and the unknown can be scary when I don’t trust my Restorer.  So, I resist the movement of God’s restoring hand.  And, sometimes, I even fight it. 

And, that is one thing that makes this analogy different.
 
An old broken down car doesn’t have choices,
but God, my Restorer, gives me the freedom to choose
whether or not I want to take part in His restoration process, or not.

As you may have guessed by now, my Father-in-law, the family wagon, the Old Coupe, and the spare tire made it safely home.  And, for the next 3 years work would ensue for this massive restoration project. 

Of course, in those years were moments of sincere joy and excitement, as well as feelings of overwhelm and discouragement.  It was a huge undertaking, and on top of this restoration project he was in the midst of raising three sons, one would be my future husband.  So in 1981 the old coupe began to collect dust in the space of the garage that the guys nicknamed, “The Hole”.

Maybe you can relate to feeling little to no progress in your own soul’s restoration.  Sometimes we can feel like we were left to sit in a dark corner with no vision of hope for our future. 

If there were thoughts and feelings under the Old Coupe’s hood, would it have felt abandoned at this time? 

Maybe hopeless, worthless, or too far gone? 

Did it feel worthy of being given up on? 

Did it understand that the mechanic didn’t lose love or heart?  Surely the old coupe didn’t understand my Father-in-Law’s plans and intentions.  It wasn’t the car’s role to know why it was left to wait.

I’m guessing that my Father-in-law would sometimes go out to “The Hole” just to look at his now dusty old coupe.  He would imagine its storied past and think about all the hard work that it would need to get it up and running again.  Some may have given up at this point, but my Father-in-law hung in there.  He believed that it wasn’t too far gone.   His dreams of what the end result might look and feel like would surely spur him on to not lose hope, that someday this old thing would drive him out of that garage. 

His dreams for that old car didn't involve restoring it back to its original state, rather he dreamed of making it run like it never ran before.   Run with more power and speed that would have left Henry Ford jaw-dropped, especially since he chose to put a chevy motor under the old Ford’s hood.  He didn’t plan on fixing its original weak wheels, but instead he chose to purchase new, beefier wheels that could hold bigger and stronger tires to be able to live up to the power that he imagined would someday be under its hood. 

A day would come when he would completely tear out the interior and replace it with seats that would be reupholstered from a discovery found in a junkyard.  A new steering wheel, headliner, speedometer….everything would change so that it would be transformed into a clean and sleek place for a driver and passenger to cruise in.

He loved the Old Coupe for what it was while sitting in the “The Hole”, and he loved it for what He would be able to restore it into, someday.  But, it had to sit and wait for his hand for seven long years.  I can think of other stories that had to wait 7 years, but, I’m gonna do my best to stay focused here.

Cause, there came a day when my mother-in-law and father-in-law had the talk.  It was time to either get rid of the dust collector so that maybe another restorer would bring it back to life, or it was time for him to dive back into the arduous project. 


So, he got back to work.
An hour and a half each day after work, and about 6 hours every Saturday.

Countless hours of sparks flying from the grinding wheel as it took away what was no longer helpful. 

Cutting away what could actually cause more harm. 

Like a cancer that spreads to destroy a body’s cells, and like a bitterness that grows to harden a heart… rust could eat away at the steel on his old coupe, if not aggressively, yet tenderly cared for.

Month after month of getting everything tuned just right so the Old Coupe would be able to drive again with a power and speed that it had never even dreamed possible.

New Chassis.  New running boards.   New metal and strong welds that would eventually be covered and protected with primer and new layers of shiny blue paint.

And my mind wonders as I curiously wait with hope for what my Restorer might be doing with the bullets that have wounded my soul.

My father-in-law figures that he spent well over 2000 hours of invested time into this thing.

Another option could have been to give up on the Old Coupe. Buy something else, maybe even a kit car that didn’t require such heart and soul. But, no, he loved the Old Coupe and chose to continue to press on.

Unfortunately, the process of restoring my soul is sometimes similar.  It feels so long, hard, even bleak at times. 

It can be painful as my Restorer grinds away the unhealthy parts of me.  Agonizing as He rips out what felt familiar. 

It sometimes feels excruciating and torturous to be under the knife of soul-restoring... for so long...

and I sometimes wonder, will I ever run with such freedom and strength like my father-in-law’s old coupe does now?

How long will it take for God to restore my soul?

One thing I am learning is that God is a patient Restorer.

I recently find myself replaying and listening to lyrics written by “Hillsong” -

 “You could have saved us in a second, instead you sent a child”.

Those words grab me in my discouragement. They give me perspective and offer me hope.

Hmmm…. Why didn’t God choose a faster way? Why did He choose to send a baby who needed time to grow into a man for the purpose of restoring my soul?

One thing I know, is that this man, Jesus, really KNOWS what it is like to be fully human… He can relate to my feelings of impatience and heartache.

So, I listen on as Hillsong's words remind me that life has seasons. Seasons that can be so difficult and long, yet offer so much fruit. 

“Like frost on a rose, 

winter comes for us all. 

Oh, how nature acquaints us, 

with the nature of patience. 

And like a seed in the snow, 

I’ve been buried to grow

For Your promise is loyal

From seed to sequoia.”

The words to this song draw me in.

How often have I felt buried by it all. Deep in the dark, with no light to see that there is hope. 

Those seasons can feel like no progress is being made, and that possibly my Restorer has forgotten my state. Or worse yet, when He is ripping out what is unhealthy in me, I feel confused and hurt by what feels like His LACK of care for me, rather than feeling His compassionate care for my soul.

Truly my Restorer’s ways don’t make sense to me all the time, especially when I’m in the dark…
for a season.

And Hillsong sings on…

“Though the winter is long even richer

The harvest it brings

Though my waiting prolongs even greater

Your promise for me.

Like a seed,

I believe that my season will come”

I choose to believe these words are true… and I am even able to call to my mind times in the past when I have seen the Restorer’s progress on my own soul.

Hope begins to be felt.

“I can see the promise

I can see the future

You’re the God of seasons

I’m just in the winter

If all I know of harvest

Is that it’s worth my patience

Then if You’re not done working

God I’m not done waiting

You can see my promise

Even in the winter

Cause You’re the God of greatness

Even in a manger”

I wonder if, at times, my father-in-law got discouraged at how much work needed to be done yet. 

I know I get discouraged at times when I feel the lack of progress in my own heart’s story.  And, I am reminded that it is good for me to look back and to see what my Restorer has already done in my life.  Just like I shared in the last post…  “I recall God’s faithfulness, therefore I have hope”. Lamentations 3:21

Where are you at in your heart’s journey… your restoration story? 

Are you overwhelmed?  Defeated?  Discouraged? 

Can you recall seasons of darkness where God's faithful hand broke through and gave you hope?

You know, that “old coupe” is no longer the “abandoned car”, the "project car", or the "broken down thing", rather it is now considered "The Street Rod”. 

My father-in-law brought it to his garage in 1978, and then after 17 long awaited years, he got to drive it out of the garage and onto the road for the first time in its restored state. 

It is no longer used for target practice. It no longer sits in “The Hole”, but rather it is a beautiful shiny blue with a powerful motor and a radio that happily plays the “oldies” while driving to car shows.  And, would you believe that “Old Coupe” is now an award winning show car?

I bet those kids on the reservation would have never imagined the story of this old car’s future.

And I can’t help but wonder… do they know that there is a chance for a crazy and wild hope for their story too? 

Do you know that nothing and no one is too far gone? 

The process of being restored might be long and even bleak at times, but take heart, because your Restorer is in the process of tenderly and carefully restoring stuff inside of your soul...
and, possibly even, someone else’s soul in your life. 

Do you know that God can bring life to the seemingly lifeless? 

And maybe if you begin to believe this, then you will no longer call yourself (or others),
“too broken”, “too far gone”, “reckless”, “hopeless”... or whatever. 

But maybe someday you will be able to identify yourself with the dream that our Restorer is dreaming for you. 

And, as you grow to know this Restorer’s love for you, and you begin to trust Him more, then maybe you will be able to rest rather than fight your soul’s restoration process.

I am fighting to choose to press in and believe that underneath all the layers of rust and loss is a deep and beautiful layer of hope.  It just needs the Restorer’s thoughtful and loving hand… and sometimes this kind of heart work also needs time. 

Hang in there friends, He is not finished with you yet.

There is always hope. We are all restorable

If these words resonated with your season, then I'd love to hear from you.  You can send me an 

email or find me on facebook and instagram. 

Let me know how you are doing in your season.

AND, if you would love a weekend filled with soul rest and restoration, then I would love for you to join me at the Restorable Retreat! 

Registration is open until February 5th.  Click here for more info.

Thanks so much for journeying with me here, Jen