There is just something about taking pen to paper.  Something that I sure don’t understand, but know that there is even scientific evidence backing up that writing things down impacts your brain. 

So, this past winter I chose to write down Psalm 23.  Left side of my journal - Psalm 23.  Right page - my reflection.  Everyday.  I did this so that I might receive something deeper as I was preparing for the Restorable Retreat.  And, then I decided to invite each of the retreat ladies to do the same and receive alongside with me.  I chose that famous chapter in Psalms simply because of verse 4… “He restores my soul”.

I’ve spent several years now pondering about soul restoration. 

I’ve mulled over it, written about it, and have received a hope that is deeper than I can understand.  A hope, that has become a deep belief, that my soul, and the souls around me are truly restorable. 

God has hope for our souls, so much so that He chose to allow His only Son to die on the cross for us.  And, if He would actually do that (which He did)... if He would actually make such a radical sacrifice, then HE must have hope for us.

Soaking in this truth day after day, and I am convinced that NO ONE is too far gone.  We ALL MUST be restorable in His eyes if He would do such a radical thing for us.

But, sometimes this “hope” thing gets misunderstood. 

We hear the word “hope” or “restorable”, and think…”Not my circumstances”.  To which, I CAN’T always argue.

God doesn’t always restore our circumstances, does He?

God doesn't promise to change our finances, our health, our marriage relationship or status, or our children’s choices, but rather, He is all about restoring SOULS.

And as I was preparing for the Restorable Retreat this past winter, I imagined some of the attending women.  Women who would really love it if God would just restore their circumstances.  And while my heart felt heavy for them, I also felt so aware that God wanted to breathe hope into their stories with the too-deep-to-understand Truth that He is in the process of restoring our souls.  In fact, He may even be using that hard circumstance for their soul’s restoration.  And, I wondered, if we could acknowledge and believe that our soul was in the process of being restored, how could that possibly affect our hope, and maybe even our view of our hard circumstances.

So, as God was calling me to create this safe and nurturing environment, I felt so pulled to follow the example of the Shepherd in Psalm 23. 

I have grown to absolutely LOVE the visual from Psalm 23.  The picture of a shepherd.. The Good Shepherd.  My Shepherd.  And the picture of a sheep in the valley of the shadow of death.

God is the Shepherd and you and I are the sheep in the story. 

And, while we are in the thick of our death valley/ our hard circumstance, God, our good Shepherd remains with us and leads us THROUGH it.  Like when a shepherd leads his flock of sheep, He protects them from predators, and leads them toward what they need while in and while getting through the depths of a valley.

The women at the retreat privately named their valley.  We called it their “It”. 

“IT”... the thing that knocks them over,  makes them angry, or brings tears to their eyes.  They were honest with themselves and with God while they sat safely on the couches and in their bedrooms at the retreat.

Most of us wished that our hard thing wouldn’t even be real.  We wanted it to go away, or if that couldn’t happen, we wanted to HURRY UP and get OVER it!

BUT, when we looked at Psalm 23, we saw that the Shepherd didn’t snatch the sheep out of the valley.   He didn’t even rush them by making them run night and day until they “passed through it”.  Rather, we noticed how the Shepherd encouraged the sheep to lie down in the very thick of it.  (and I think… “no thank you, lets just keep moving and get past all of this darkness!)

He laid them down in what was likely lush, green valley vegetation with the soothing sounds and availability of refreshing water nearby.  (and sometimes… I don’t even want to take the time for rest, beauty and nourishment, I’d rather keep hustling and working until all the hard was somehow “fixed”)

While the sheep rested there in their valley, the Shepherd remained there with them, standing guard to be sure to protect them.

And as I dreamed and imagined what that kind of pasture nurturing would look like, I pictured the old farmhouse that we lived in for 7 years.

This farmhouse was not exactly a dreamy Magnolia Home.  In fact, some days, I would say that it was more of a tear-er-downer rather than a fixer-upper.  It was cold and drafty in the winters, and the upstairs, where we all slept, only received heat that rose up the walled stairway. 

One might say that the house was, in some ways, part of and representative of a valley season…

BUT… in other ways, it was also very much a restoring season that offered rest, beauty and nourishment.

Honestly, there were plenty of reasons for me to want to hurry up and move out of that old farmhouse, but in so many other ways, I so badly wanted to stay.  I wanted to rest and linger there as long as possible. 

If I could just take you there, I’d have you stand on the balcony off of our bedroom.  If you could sleep there even just one summer night to smell the fresh air and feel the breeze through that balcony door.  If you could hear the calm movement of the river as you drifted off to sleep, then you might understand that there were some serious treasures in that old home.

Truly though, the dilapidating balcony was only special because of what it overlooked.  Out beyond that balcony, the back porch and yard was about 11 acres of pasture land that bordered the Conestoga River.  It was private, serene and the absolute best part of living there.  Don’t get me wrong… there were plenty of other wonderful things like swimming in the river and playing on the swing that hung from the old bridge.  There was my lush garden, the old fruitful yellow delicious tree, and the covered back porch that hosted all of our family’s meals from early spring to late fall.

But the pasture had a special place in my heart.  It was a place to step away and catch my breath for a moment.  I didn’t need to get into my car to go to receive from this precious space.  I didn’t even need to throw on shoes if I didn’t want to.  I could just walk back there barefooted to sort of free up some head and heart space.

As you may imagine... I remember other kinds of special moments too, like throwing walnuts from the old tree into the water as our youngest son and I watched them race down the slow moving river.  Not long after we moved there, my husband received a rope from our friend Dean and hung a tire swing on that old walnut tree.  Countless memories were shared swinging kids and adults on the old tire, as well as on the rope swing under the bridge.

As you can imagine, I also had the privilege of having many families and individuals traipse through the pasture and even in the river to capture their unique beauty with my cameras. 

Friends loved coming over and eating outside with us under the old back porch roof.  Many would tell us how they felt like they stepped into another world… a world of calm, a world of simplicity and a world of safety.  It was a special space that often blessed people with a breath of fresh air, and time to relax. (Yet, not many would have chosen to live there in this sort of dilapidated place… remember, there was something about it that made it a valley place...  an undesirable place, that somehow souls still desired.)

THAT imagery and those memories… they are just a small fraction of something like what the Shepherd may have offered the traveling sheep in the pasture while in the valley of the shadow of death. 

He didn’t change their circumstances, rather, He invited them to rest in the midst of them, to discover treasures in the presence of the hard, and to see the beauty that was part of the valley. 

As I would take breaks from the old farmhouse to walk back into the pasture, sometimes I, like the sheep in psalm 23, chose to literally lie down.  Just me, the tall grasses, the sound of the water and the wide open sky above me.  It was like a little reset in the day for me.

God gave the sheep a little “reset”.  He led them to lie down for rest, beauty and nourishment, and then He led them on paths towards right choices.  He restored their souls as they moved and as they paused along the way.

So, I knew that the Restorable retreat needed to follow the Shepherd’s example by creating a weekend that offered rest, beauty and nourishment.  It needed to somehow be a safe space where weary women could engage in the process of true and lasting restoration.  One of my prayers was that as they received and dug deep that they would taste a deep layer of hope that could anchor their souls.

And, so they did.  And it was so rich. 

It was rich for some like the lush and nutritious green grass might have been for the sheep in a valley. 

It was rich for others like a peaceful sleep would be while a protector stood over them and cared for all the weights of this world. 

It was supernaturally eye-opening for some as they took a breather from the hustle called life, and saw a deeper beauty that God wanted to offer them.

Mostly what they needed to do was just say “yes” to taking the time.  They needed to be open to what God might have for them.

Ok, I just made it sound kind of easy, didn’t I?..

But, the truth is, it isn’t always easy to say “yes” to taking time for soul care.  In fact, it is so hard that, for some, it feels absolutely IMPOSSIBLE. 

Like the one woman who showed up exhausted after leaving sudden chaos in her home, it was hard.  She felt so pulled to stay home, be responsible and care for her little boy with a fresh new injury. 

Or like the other woman who was choosing to step away from her sweet toddler for the very first time. 

And then the woman who didn’t know if she was making a good financial decision. 

The countless concerns, insecurities and fears that so many of them faced as they considered being in a new environment with women that they never met.  Would anyone like them?  Would they feel awkward the whole time?  Were they the only one who struggled with social anxiety or even snoring?

BUT GOD… God kept nudging these women, and pulling them to go. 

Just step away, be open, receive and TRUST the Shepherd to care for it all… to care for them. 

Trust, while in the thick of hard decisions, isn’t a snap of the fingers. 

In fact, sometimes it is a deep wrestling match with all kinds of emotions.  To hold onto control and fear is more or less a natural response, but letting go of all those things, and stepping into trust… well, that is where true rest is found. 

In fact God told a group of people in the Old Testament that they wouldn’t even be able to enter rest because of their unbelief. (Hebrews 3:19)

And as God continued to nudge these retreat women to trust Him with their concerns, they eventually said “yes”, and chose to take TIME to receive from Him.  This time, it happened to be through the Restorable Retreat.

So, we created a beautiful weekend filled with deep meaning, safety, rest, beauty and nourishment.. And it was great, really great.  As I tell so many, “it was supernatural”...

                                 but then we drove away, and for many of the women, Monday came. 

They hit the ground running, because life is full and the demands are many.  These were responsible women caring for the needs in front of them.. And that is all good, BUT… like so many of them said, “they needed MORE TIME”.

Taking time for rest, beauty and nourishment is hard to choose with all of life’s demands, and heaviness.

BUT, we CAN choose it. 

We can choose it on an intensive retreat weekend, and we can choose it regularly on our own. 

In a sense, we need to keep going back to the “green pasture”.  We need to keep our hearts so attuned to our Shepherd that we sense His regular invitations to receive for the purpose of soul restoration. 

Our family no longer lives with a green pasture outside of our kitchen window, and I can no longer step outside to see the sunrise or to listen to the river’s moving water. 

But there are other “green pastures” in my life. 

For instance, even though I don’t always feel like it, I choose to move my body by running or walking on the roads near my home.  

I also know that when I take time to create, whether through my camera lens, a paint brush, my kitchen counter, or other avenues, I feel a freshness, like a-wind-in-my-sails sort of freshness.

Other “green pastures”, for me, include planting and picking food straight out of my backyard… There is just something about being in the dirt and watching things slowly turn into food for my family.  It just doesn’t get old for me, and that time in the garden or by my chickens is often a bit of a “reset” for me.. It sort of has a way of clearing out some cobwebs in my brain and heart, and keeping me grounded in a way that being on my computer screen too much can’t.

But, I think that above all, the “green pasture” that leads me best towards soul restoration happens on my couch each morning.  I grab a glass of lemon water, wrap a blanket around my legs, and begin talking to God on paper.  Maybe you would call that journaling.  For me it is a space to talk to God without my brain distracting me.  I can tell Him anything.  He carries my burdens, and as He does, I often find myself led to thank Him for this and that.  And then, after pouring my heart out for a time, I get to pull out my Bible so that I can be taught and inspired by the Greatest Soul Teacher and Caregiver ever.  Without these regular “green pasture” moments, I think my soul would feel choked rather than on a path towards restoration.

For one of the women at the retreat, she chose a “green pasture” moment by walking outside to go and feed the goats.  Some of the ladies chose to lie down and take a much needed nap, while other women found their “green pasture” by taking time to talk with other women while painting signs at the dining room table.

For sure, each of us women moved towards soul restoration when we trusted our Shepherd to keep us safe while we acknowledged and named our death valley.  It wasn’t easy, but it was some of the best soul care that we have chosen to take time… in a long time.

“Green pastures” could be found at the beach or the mountains, or right through your kitchen window. 
Possibly starting a gratitude journal or listening to music that directs your heart and mind towards Truth.
True rest, beauty and nourishment is also found when choosing food that satisfies your hunger as well as your spirit.

Bottom line?... Rest, beauty & nourishment that points us towards soul restoration is not only found on a weekend getaway,  but can also be discovered in our everyday lives.  If we are willing to trust our Shepherd to care for us enough while we receive from Him.

Whatever your “green pasture” might be, I hope that you know that it is ok to take a break from the hard or the hustle. 
It is ok to lie down and get a breather. 
It is ok that your soul needs rest for restoration. 
It is ok for you to choose to receive in the thick of your valley, and when you do, you are ultimately choosing to trust God while you lie down in it.

"He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters.  He restores my soul; ... even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me."         Psalm 23

To learn more about the Restorable Retreat 2022
be sure to sign up for my email newsletter,
and save the date on your calendar for February 25 - 27, 2022